For better or for worse, we are the creators, the architects, the authors whom ultimately shape our future.
Some people are blessed with a clear vision about their lives. They know what they want to accomplish and are focus each step of the way. I admire them.
This is not my case.
For the most part of my existence, I have seen myself as free-spirited. Probably to avoid the harsh reality of acknowledging my lack of consistency. In fact, I am still struggling.
When I started to write Anticipation, I was enthusiastic and eager for someone to read the novel. I received great feedback and for the most part, they loved the story. However, as I learned more about writing and its process, I decided to edit the book.
It wasn’t long before my excitement vanished and my focus turned back to painting.
Editing is an arduous and time-consuming part of writing.
To justify my lack of attention, my first thought was simple… I must make the time to paint again. Although, this was the first of many excuses to come, it was true that I had pushed aside my greatest passion for the thrill of writing.
Nevertheless, I didn’t want to see the underlying theme to avoid the truth. This truth, my truth, is that when the tough gets going, I usually turn to something else. Yes, I am accepting that I lack persistence. I have quit other projects for this same reason.
On the other hand, through the years I learned that lashing out at myself or regretting my choices do nothing. I also learned that happiness is important. Being joyful is the bearer of a healthy body, mind, soul and life.
I am in a relationship that I want to keep. I have a job I need to focus. I have family and gatherings to attend. I want to paint as well as write. To top it off, I am taking classes.
That said, however, it all boils down to choices. I must find a balance in my life, so I may keep my sanity and bliss, while achieving my goals. At least this is my intention and wish. I also need to be objective and learn to priorities. I admire those of you that do it all and more. I wish I had that trait or a magic wand to make it easier .
In other words, I must make some
sacrifices choices. However, it is not easy. This means having to postpone the release date of my book, again! I also hate to admit that writing a blog takes time away from editing (my book), painting, family, boyfriend and studying. This leaves me with a clear path.
Although, you will be seeing less of me here, I will pop up occasionally to read your blogs, maybe write a few lines or post a new painting.
I will miss the constant interaction I had with all of you (sniff sniff ) However, as sad as it sounds (the drama queen in me), I believe this is a step to overcome one of my greatest obstacles and a hope that one day I will reach my many goals.
I wish you all the very best and leave you with the quote below by Walter Elliot.
“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other”